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Act Your Age
My 31th fanfiction. Feedback is appreciated Lincoln and Lana shows Lisa life outside her lab. At college Lisa came to her class as teacher. Lisa: Good morning class. I'm doctor Lisa Loud. 1st student: laugh You a doctor. This is a joke, you are a kid younger than me. Lisa: This is no joke. At I earned a doctorate and a Nobel Prize. 2nd student: laugh For what? Inviting new diaper? Lisa: No, it was... 2nd student: Who cares? You are just a lame joke. Lisa: If you don't stop I'll erease you from list of students. 1st student: laugh A baby threats me. How terrified I am. laugh Lisa: I'll make sure you fail my class. whole class: laugh Lisa: STOP RIGHT NOW! 1 hour later in principal's room. Principal: I was reported you failed to teach your new class anything for today. Lisa: I admit. They didn't want to listen to me. They didn't treat me seriously. Principal: It only shows your incompetence at teaching. I knew that employing you was a mistake. From now you're fired. Lisa: What? You're making a mistake by firing a doctor with Nobel Prize. Principal: On the contrary, I remove from the school the least efficient worker. Because you are a child no student will ever treat you seriously. I have to ensure the school keeps its reputation. I can't allow anybody think the school has incompetent teachers. Lisa: Only I am able to understand this branch of biochemistry. Principal: Every teacher is replacable, you are no exception. From now you don't work here any longer. You'll be replaced by an older and far more experienced teacher. I'll also make sure no school will employ you because of your scandalous incompetency. Now leave. Lisa took all her belongings from school and left it heartbroken and depressed. Watching parents playing with toddlers made her cry. A random woman came to Lisa. woman: Did you lose your mom, little girl? Lisa: I am not...ehh...Yes but don't worry I have a phone. woman: Ok. Wow, even toddlers have phones nowadays. left Lisa: her phone Mom, can you drive for me? Rita: You sound very sad, Lisa, what happened? Aren't you supposed to teach your students? Lisa: I am a teacher no longer, I was fired. Rita: Are you fired? Why? Lisa: I don't want to talk about it through phone. Please take me back to home. Rita came for Lisa by her car and took her home. Lisa was sitting on the couch depressed and her mother tried to talk to her. Lincoln returned home from school and detected Lisa. Lincoln: Hey, mom. Hey, Lisa. Rita: Good you've come, son. Lisa: broken voice Hey. Lincoln: You sounded sadly, why? Lisa: Because I'm devastated. I was fired because my students don't take me seriously because I am only 4. Lincoln: his jaw Unbelievable! How could they? You're the smartest and most educated of us. Lisa: I'm surprised I could teach for so long. I lacked the teacher authority, nobody wanted to listen to me. Rita: I will tell straight. You are very intelligent but completelly inexperienced in talking to people. Lisa: annoyed Not true! I spoke with many people! Lincoln: You barely speak with us. How do you think you can speak with other people? Lisa: They are as smart as me. I belong to the intelligent class. Rita: Don't get mad but you are wrong. Despite your supernatural intelligence you are still 4-year-old girl. Lisa: What's that supposed to mean? Rita: Exacly what I say. You are a child and people you mentioned are adults, they spoke with people in their age and developed social skills. Lincoln: Lisa, mom is right. You lack experience of talking to people. We are your family and we treat you seriously but to others you are only a 4-year-old girl. Lisa: Age is a state of mind and with my intelligence I am as mature as an adult. Rita: No book will teach you how to interact with people. You need to experience it on your own. Lisa: I am not like other children. I am a genius. Lincoln: Yes and this is your gift and curse. Because you are a prodigy you are too different from children in your age. Rita: Technically you lack normal childhood and childhood is what makes us who we are. You shall interact with children of your age. Lisa: Am I supposed to get back to pre-school? Its a complete antithesis of progress. How is that supposed to help? Rita: Because if you gather experience in interacting with other people you'll know how to speak with them. Lincoln: So it's time to plan operation of teaching Lisa how to act her age. I need to think about a shorter name. Rita: Thank you for volunteering, sonny. Once you helped Lucy, so I hope you'll help Lisa as well. Lincoln: Alright Lisa. Lisa: No, it's not alright! I am mentally an adult and you want to treat me like toddler. Lincoln: That's how others treat you. No matter how smart you are, still you are a child like we all once were. Lisa: Are you trying to say people will treat me seriously, when I am an adult? Lincoln: Perhaps but without social skills even as an adult you won't be able to speak with anybody. Prodigies are rare when avarage people are common. Genius are usually surrouned by avarage and have no choice but to live among them. Lisa: Are you telling me this from your own experience? Lincoln: Yes. I also lacked many social skills and I was an outcast. I found another outcast, Clyde and we became friends. But others aren't always that lucky. Lisa: Fine, so what shall we do now? Lincoln: For the start we can play video games. Lincoln showed Lisa how to play in his video game. Lisa: What's the point of showing unrealistic characters fighing in such ridiculous way? Their movements break laws of physics. There is no way such strength would be in one punch. Lincoln: The game shows what you can't see in the real life and that's cool. Lisa: The graphics are unrealistic, sounds are unnatural and such mutations are impossible. I wonder if creators of the game aren't children in adult bodies. Lincoln: If you don't like video games, then let's watch tv. Lisa: Ok, let's watch. Lincoln: Here are Space Troopers. Lisa: There is no sound in space and ships with such shape wouldn't fly. Lincoln: Why can't you just enjoy instead of wondering if it's logical or not? Lisa: Irrational images aren't realistic and in result not credible. Lincoln: What do you wish to watch then? Lisa: In tv is never what I need. I use internet. Lincoln: We watched together Dream Boat. Admit you like it. Lana: Hey guys, what's up? Lisa: Lincoln tries to show me how a 4-year-old girl should play by showing me the stupid stuff he likes. Lincoln: Hey! Don't call it stupid! Lana: Lisa, I'm closer to your age. I'll show you how to play. Why is this after all so necessary? Lincoln: Because Lisa lacks experience in life. She technically never had childhood. Lana: her jaw Wha...? Oh, that's awful. Lisa: Maybe for you. I already matured. Lana: Why do you want to be mature? Being a kid is great! Lisa: I am above kiddy things. Lana: No, you aren't. When we ate at the kiddie table you join food fights. Lisa: Oh, right, Lincoln: And once in shop you tried to use fridge to kriogenics. Do you think it was mature? It was childish. Lisa: Scientists are often misunderstood. Lincoln: Stop it! I learned that we shall enjoy our childhood and don't rush with growing up. So for at least once stop being a scientist and be a kid. Lisa: worried I am not a typical kid. I never was. In fact I don't know how kids in my age play. Lana: Then let us both show you. You deserve a childhood you could enjoy. Lincoln and Lana took Lisa outside on their backyard. Lana dived in mud pit. Lisa: What kind of fun is in this? Lana: It's cold and dense, so pleasant for skin. Lisa: It's gross. Lana: You say it because you never did it. grabbed Lisa and pulled her into her pit Lisa: I'm dirty! Why shall I enjoy this? got hit by mud ball Lana: laugh Oh, admit it, it's fun for you. Lisa: You want a fight? Have it! Lana and Lisa were throwing mudball at each other and Lincoln just observed it giggling. He's got hit by mud ball and stopped laughing. Lincoln: So how do you feel, Lisa? Lisa: I behaved so immature. Weird, but I kidna enjoyed it. Lincoln: See? You are not so above this. Deep in your heart and mind you want to be a child. During one winter you enjoyed snowball fight. Lana: You really want to be like all other in your age. I like what I am and I admit it. Lisa: I don't get how a genius like me can like such childish unproductive play? Lincoln: Who says geniuses can't have fun? You are a child so nothing you do is childish. You're just following your inner instincts. Lisa: My inner instincts tell me that I should take a bath. Lincoln: And I shall change shirt. Lana: Don't look at me. I love this! Lincoln: You already are taking bath. Enjoy. Lana: Yeah! Lincoln and Lisa got back home. He changed his shirt and she took bath, she left bathroom in her green bathrobe and with towel on head. Lisa: I'd like to go to my lab. Lincoln: Why do you spend whole your time here? Lisa: For science. My studies can change the world for better. Lincoln: What do you believe to achieve now? Lisa: I wish to free myself from primitive needs like going to toilet. That's why I plan to make a pill that helps accelerates metabolism. Thanks to this all what I eat will be consumed in 99%. Lincoln: Why do you not play with your family instead? Lisa: Same reason you prefer to read comics alone. I need silence to focus. Nobody in our family shares my interests and none of them is smart enough to help me. Lincoln: Did you try to find common interests with them. Lisa: In fact I never tried. Lincoln: So try this time. Experience the other taste of life for a variety. Lisa: Ok, I'll try but I need to get dressed. Lisa fully dressed came to the twins room. Lola: You shall knock first! Lincoln: Take it easy, it's our home. Lola: It doesn't mean you shall have no class. Lisa: Can I play with you? Lola: Did I mishear? You ask me to let you play with me? Lisa: Precisely. Lola: Ok, then. Let's play with my plushies. Lisa: They don't have natural proportions. Lincoln: Lisa, don't complain. Toys are supposed to be cute not realistic. Lola: Listen to our brother. Lisa: Fine, so what do we do? Lincoln observed how Lola and Lisa were playing with plushies. They were shaking them and talking through them. However Lisa ruined fun when she started saying words Lola doesn't understand. Lola: Lisa! If you wanna play then at least use words I can understand. Lisa: This is my most common vocabulary. Lola: Then the only animal you can play would be an owl. Lisa: Actually animals don't talk so what's the point of playing talking animals? Lola: annoyed Ugh! Because in real life they don't talk and imgining they can is cool! Play with my rules or get out! Lincoln: Girls! Stop. Lola: Girls?! Lisa is the one who needs to be stopped! She's ruining my play. Lincoln: Lisa, for once stop thinking like scientist and think like a child. You're smart so you surely can imagine animals talking. And use simple language or you'll never communicate with other people. Lisa: Sigh, fine. 20 minutes later. Lola: This was much better. You can play normally if you want. Lisa: I admit that was interesting. But how can this help me? Lincoln: Simple question. How can you teach people if you technically never spoke to them? Lisa: Well... Lincoln: You can't because you don't know how. You need to experience this on your own. You won't find it in any book. No book will tell you how to live. Lisa: So what now? Lana: to her room You played with Lola so now my turn. Lisa: I have no desire to soak myself in wet ground. Lana: This time we'll play with my pets. This is Izzy. showed Izzy Lisa: Interesting member of Lacertidae family. Lana: Izzy is a member of our family! Izzy: smile Lincoln: Lisa, use common language if you speak with people. Lisa: Lacertidae is a common word for me but OK. Lacertidae family means wall lizard family. Lana: Finally you talk my way. Lisa: Do you know that lizards are native to Europe, Africa, and Asia? Lana: I do. Most of them eat instects. Izzy's favorite food are flies. licked Lana Oh, it's feeding time. Bon appétit! fed Izzy who later licked his lips on sign he enjoyed his meal. Lisa: Do you know lizards restore their lost limbs? Like tail or leg? Lana: Wow! But I won't let you hurt Izzy to prove it! Lisa: Don't worry. Proving something that was already proven won't be any profit. Lana: Good to know. Oh, Izzy got sleepy. Have nice dreams kissed Izzy Lincoln: So cute. Izzy is like your own child. Lana: You said it, big bro. Lisa: At least I found a subject to talk with Lana about. Lincoln: When I was at your age I played blocks with my elder sisters and drawed a lot. Lisa: I can build complex devices and drew its blueprints. Lincoln: You may not remember this but you used to play this too. If not that you wouldn't be able to build your inventions nor draw blueprints. Everything starts from scratch. Lisa: Now I do remember and it was fun. Lana: Another common subject we have are tools. I am very handy. Lisa: surprised Why did I never detect this? Lincoln: Maybe because you look only on your test subjects. Lisa: Right. I am so focused on science I see nothing else. I fail to see that I have something in common with you. Lana: Not true, you and I like Dairyland Amoosement Park. Lincoln: Me too. We can't buy tickets for Dairyland but we can go to the city park. Lana: There are lot of things we can play together. Lisa: I doubt that but I'll go with you. I have lot of free time since I teach no more. Lincoln took Lisa and Lana to park. Lisa observed toddlers playing. Lisa: So that's how children at my age? Lana: I still play like that. Lincoln: Join them and have fun. Lisa: Nothing they do seems to have purpose. It makes no sense. Lana: Oh, come on! grabbed Lisa Let's play with them. Lincoln: I'll keep my eyes on you. Lana showed Lisa swings, put her in chair and pushed her. Lisa: What's so funny in this? Lana: Ehh, don't you feel excited? Lisa: No. Lana: Then let's climb on this slide and well, slide. Lisa: climbing I feel tired. Lana: Then let's go down quick! Let's do it together. Lisa: Fine. Lana: sliding Weee! Lisa: So much effort put into going up to go down back in 3 seconds? That's no fair trade! Lana: Then let's try carousel. and Lana went to the carousel Lisa: What will make us move? Lincoln: I'll do it. put the carousel in motion Lana: Yahoo! Lisa: the spining, she felt bad Ugh! All dizzy! My head! Oh. fainted Lincoln: Lisa! took her on his arms Lisa: I see five Lincolns. Ugh! Lana: Oh no! Lincoln: It's my fault! I could have predicted this! After some time Lisa woke up lying on bench with headache. Lisa: Ugh! What happened? Lincoln: I'm sorry. This was your first try and I forgot I felt so bad on my first try. Lisa: How can 4-year-old children like such activity that makes you faint or puke? Lana: How can you not find fun in such dynamic activity? Lisa: Maybe I'm just not tough like you. Lincoln: This reminds me how Lynn tries to make me play with her. If you don't like it we can play chess. Lisa: Fine, no more spinning! Lincoln played chess with Lisa and it ended with a draw. Lincoln: Oh, no! Now none of us can win. Did you at least enjoy it? Lisa: Chess is a simple logical problem to me. Yes, I did enjoy it. Lincoln: It seems you like game where is mathematics. Of course! You often solve complex equations. You like solving mathematical problems. Lisa: Yes. It seems such games make me have fun. Lincoln: There are some mathematical games children at you age play. Lisa: Really? What's this? Lincoln: Hopscotch. Lana: Did someone say hopscotch? Lincoln: Oh, you have a companion to play with. Lisa: Lincoln said that's a mathematical game. Let's check it. Lana played with Lisa in hopscotch nuch to joy of them both. Lincoln: It ends with draw. Lana: So, how do you find it? Lisa: There was more jumping than mathematics. excited But I enjoyed it! Yeah! worried Oh no! The primitive activities make me feel fun. Its so inappropriate! What happens to me? Am I getting childish? Lana: laugh You can't be childish because you are a child. Lincoln: You just follow your instincs, Lisa. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Lisa: I am a genius. I am supposed to be mature! Lincoln: You keep telling this to yourself and you're wrong. At school that was why you failed to teach. You gave yourself too much credit. Lisa: crying I'm so pathetic. I am a child thinking to be someone big. I was deluding myself from the start! Lincoln: Hey! Don't cry. hugged Lisa Making mistakes is a human thing. I do a lot of mistakes and learn from them. You are smart so you also can do this. Lana: You're still a kid like me, you have lot time to learn. I am happy from being a kid. Find fun in this too. Lisa: You're both right. Despite being a genius I am still a kid who has lot to learn. I need to learn how to live. I never say admit it but sometimes I wish I was regular. Lincoln: I am a regular boy who want to be special and you are a special girl who wants to be regular. What an irony. Lana: I like who I am and I don't care if I'm regular or special. I love myself. Lisa: I also shall love myself for being who I am. But what can I help with fact I like making my experiments the most? Lincoln: You also like mathematics. It's OK to like mathematical games like chess or sudoku. Those games are good for training mind. You are a very smart girl but it doesn't mean you don't deserve to have fun. Lisa: What do you mean? Lincoln: You're a prodigy in science but still you need to get older and wiser. Talk with people and play with them. That will help you improve your communication skills. Lisa: You're right. When I speak to people I don't use words commonly used by them. I only express my intelectual superiority. No wonder I failed to teach my students. All because my brain uses most of energy for thinking, too few is left for emotions. Lincoln: I think it's only because you keep telling yourself this. You are who you want to be. If you want to be a kid sometimes don't stop yourself. Lana: He's right. If you wanna be a regular kid then be a regular kid. You're still young so enjoy being young. There is no need for rush in growing up for you. Lincoln: And if you wanna be a teacher then first learn how to be a teacher by experience. Lisa: That was...the most important lesson to me. Thank you guys. gave Lincoln and Lana a big hug You helped me realise that despite being a genius and a prodigy I still have much to learn. Lincoln: I'm happy you feel better. Lana: What do you wish to do now? Lisa: Let's go home and enjoy hanging out with rest of our family. Lincoln: You're always welcome. Lisa: I still have my job to reclaim but thanks to you I know how to start. For now let's go home. Lincoln and Lana grabbed Lisa's hands began coming back home. THE END Trivia *This is my second fanfic focusing on Lisa, first one was "The Great Louddoors". *This is the third time I wrote a fanfiction based on canceled idea of someone else. Earlier were "The Great Louddoors" by THELOUDHOUSEFANATIC and "Sister Envy" by YoshiRocker13. *I considered giving a scene of Lisa and Lana playing in a poll of colourful balls in the end but I didn't use it in the end. Category:Episodes Category:Fanfiction Category:Episodes focusing on Lisa Loud